We are officially done with Week 3 of the NFL season. 3 weeks of touchdowns and 3 weeks of injuries. Some big names have gone down already and some new guys have stepped up and balled out. Big Ben, Nick Foles and Drew Brees are out and Gardner Minshew and Daniel Jones have arrived. All in all, we have seen enough football to know who is good and who is not. So here is my Official Weekly Power Rankings Countdown. I will count back from 32 and finish with the number 1. That is why it is called a ranking and a countdown. I will also grade their chances on making the playoffs based on the classic scavenger hunt game Hot or Cold, except I will give it a cool name remix by naming it after the coldest person in the league that can also heat up at any given moment: Alvin Kamara. I mean coldest there as in coolest and most fun to watch, but on the Kamara scale it is not a good thing, you want to be hot. This is the first one ever and I will make edits from here on out. Leave your thoughts in the comments or just hit me on the Twitter. Lets go
32. Miami Dolphins
I mean that one is a given. Tank for Tua. Tank for Jerry Jeudy. It does not really matter who they get because the rest of that team still stinks. They have a good quarterback in Josh Rosen, they have an okay running back Kenyan Drake. Everything else is sketchy. They will probably go 1-15 with that 1 win being against the Jets.
Kamara Scale: Ice Cold
31. New York Jets
Yep, the AFC is weak as fuck again this year. This isn’t your typical Jets squad though this is a Jets team that should have been good but they are having a really rough start, Darnold has Mono and their backups keep getting hurt. You would think their run game and defense would be able to help but LeVeon has been quiet and their defense is average at best. Even when Darnold comes back I cant see them winning more than 5 games.
Kamara Scale: Cold
30. Cincinnati Bengals
The Bengals really haven’t done a single thing this season, A.J. Green is hurt, Joe Mixon hasn’t done anything. Dalton and Ross have been a positive but thats about it for this 0-3 team.
Kamara Scale: Ice Cold
29. Washington Redskins
In 25 years please don’t pull this blog and cancel me for using a bad word. This team will be trash until they start Dwayne Haskins. Free Simba!
Kamara Scale: Ice Cold (but they have Haskins just sitting their waiting to make them cool again)
28. Oakland Raiders
They had a wild offseason and their anticipated WR1 got ran out of town. They looked great week 1 but since then they have showed little promise on the field. Josh Jacobs isn’t getting his much deserved touches, Carr looks average and the defense can’t defend.
Kamara Scale: Ice Cold
27. New York Giants
It looks like their leap for Daniel Jones at #6 was a great pick, the rookie was poised and led them down the field for a comeback. However, their the Giants and their can only be one star so as Jones was rising, their star Running Back Saquon Barkley was sitting out with an ankle injury. I blame the media but thats just how it goes in the jungle.
Kamara Scale: Cold
26. Denver Broncos
Okay so the Broncos are really bad but I don’t think they are the worst team. I saw some good things in their game vs Green Bay. The run game was looking good but thats about it. Lord Pretty Joey Flacco is bad and their defense is old. not great
Kamara Scale: Cold
25. Pittsburgh Steelers
Big Ben got hurt and they have nothing left. James Conner cant do anything and JuJu is getting too much attention as their only threat. There are a lot of bad teams in this league so thats why it feels like they’re too high but they have Minkah Fitzmagic and MAGA Rudolph. Also, they almost beat the Niners who might be good but the thing the Steelers will compete for is 3rd place in the AFC North.
Kamara Scale: Cold
24. Arizona Cardinals
They have been in a few close battles with some good teams. Kyler Murray is just learning as he goes and he’s been doing pretty well for the fact that he has other Cardinal players around him. Larry Fitz will never retire and thats a fact, but the Cards are not good at all.
Kamara Scale: Cold
23. Carolina Panthers
You cant talk about the Panthers without saying QB controversy. But I can. There is none right now, Kyle Allen is nice but Cam is Cam, he’s just injured right now. Once he comes back they will be okay. And they still have a Christian McCaffery and squad that can make the playoffs.
Kamara Scale: Warm
22. Tampa Bay Bucaneers
Mike Evans went crazy over the Giants. Jameis is still very average and I don’t think they will make much noise this year.
Kamara Scale: Cold
21. Tennessee Titans
They have had a pretty crazy season. Mariota has been really bad this year but that can be fixed by playing Ryan Tannehill.
Kamara Scale: Cold
20. Los Angeles Chargers
The running game is strong as hell, fuck a Melvin Gordon. They have Ekeler and Justin Jackson the ball carrier. Rivers is good too and has soooo many weapons. They just have too many injuries on defense, Derwin James shoutout, and that has hurt them. Could maybe push for the wild card.
Kamara Scale: Warm
19. Atlanta Falcons
Matt Ryan is all over the place so I can’t really pin this team at all. Julio has been scoring TD’s but everyone is keying on him and Ryan can’t or wont throw to other people. They do have a good chance to turn it on even though they are sketchy.
Kamara Scale: Warm
18. Jacksonville Jaguars
That defense is damn good and if Jalen Ramsey doesn’t get traded they will continue to be good. Gardner Minshew might be the best ever with his mustache. If Leonard Fournette can get going they can actually be good.
Kamara Scale: Pretty Hot
17. Detroit Lions
The Lions are decent. They have a good defense and weapons for Stafford. They could sneak in the playoffs but they will probably blow it.
Kamara Scale: Warm
16. Philadelphia Eagles
They have mad injuries so they have been struggling but I think Carson Wentz is legit so they will hang around and make a push for the playoffs.
Kamara Scale: Getting Warmer
15. San Francisco 49ers
They are 3-0 yes, but I do not trust them at all. They constantly turn the ball over and I think that is their identity. Jimmy G has been average and I don’t believe they are for real.
Kamara Scale: Warm
14. Buffalo Bills
The Bills are another untrustworthy 3-0 team. They haven’t played the best but they have had good well fought wins. True tests are coming up on the schedule.
Kamara Scale: Lukewarm
13. Seattle Seahawks
Russ is carrying this team and doing the best he can since the Seahawks gave him all their money so they cant pay anyone else. The receivers are good so they will carry them along fine.
Kamara Scale: Warm
12. Cleveland Browns
The coaching is bad so maybe they should be lower on the list but that offense has too many weapons for me to rank them too low. The defense is good but Baker is holding everyone back.
Kamara Scale: Medium heat
11. Chicago Bears
Elite defense. Still has a mediocre offense. They are improving each week but that defense is going to carry this team to a Wild Card match up
Kamara Scale: Hot
10. Indianapolis Colts
Good LUCK trying to beat these guys. Jacoby Brissett has been dealing lately and everything else has been rolling. They are still a good football team and they will compete for a playoff spot.
Kamara Scale: Hot
9. New Orleans Saints
Brees is out and they didn’t even miss a beat. That offense is still electric with Kamara and Michael Thomas and now Teddy Bridgewater. The defense will give up a lot of points but the offense can keep up for sure.
Kamara Scale: Very hot
8. Houston Texans
Deshaun Watson is a top 5 quarterback in the league, DeAndre Hopkins is a top receiver. They have a great offensive core but they have an unreliable defense that will definitely lose them games down the stretch.
Kamara Scale: Hot
7. Minnesota Vikings
They have MVP candidate Dalvin Cook and great receivers and a great defense. Everything is there for them to succeed but then you see they have Kirk Cousins at QB and you kind of cringe… The rest of their team is really good though.
Kamara Scale: As hot as Kirk likes it.
6. Baltimore Ravens
The Ravens had their first true test this past weekend against the Chiefs. They started slow but then Lamar started throwing ducks into the air and his receivers were catching them. Mix that luck with Mark Ingram and Lamar’s skills on the ground and a supposedly good defense and you have a strong team in the AFC.
Kamara Scale: Hot
5. Green Bay Packers
Aaron Rodgers has a really good defense and that is a scary thought. He is healthy, the receivers are good and they are a running back away from a deep playoff run. Legit football team.
Kamara Scale: Very Hot
4. Los Angeles Rams
The Rams are still rolling. They may have lost the Super Bowl but they aren’t hung up on it. They’re back to claim whats theirs. Goff looking good, his receivers are plentiful and Gurley is just waiting to shine.
Kamara Scale: Steady Heat
3. Dallas Cowboys
Dak is looking like an MVP. His offense is booming with Zeke and Amari Cooper and they look unstoppable. I think their defense is elite as well and if they can make a play for Ramsey they can go win it all.
Kamara Scale: Keep getting hotter.
2. Kansas City Chiefs
Patty Mahomes is still slanging that rock all over the place. He looks as comfortable as ever. Demarcus Robinson has turned into a star. Their defense is still very poor but it still doesn’t look like the Chiefs will be stopped for a while.
Kamara Scale: Red Hot
1. New England Patriots
Another obvious one. An all time great gets backed by a really good defense and that just makes for a dangerous team. The Tom Brady to Josh Gordon connection is one of the best I have ever seen. They have the Super Bowl on lock.
Kamara Scale: White Hot
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